For many months I struggled in silence, dealing with a combination of family and school issues as well as the way I viewed myself. I developed anxiety and began self harming as a result. I didn't know how to deal with my feelings, I began to worry about everything - no matter how small.
Self harming was an escape and a way of dealing with the constant worry that was taking over my life. It got to a point where my self esteem and confidence was affected massively, and I couldn't understand why I was feeling the way I did.
When my school got involved and I was referred to CAMHS, my life changed forever. I was so scared about getting help, I didn't know what to expect or how it would be. The idea of opening up to a stranger scared me and my anxiety was very high. However once I began therapy and got to know my therapist, I was amazed at how easy it was to talk about everything - which is something I hadn't really done before. I would hide everything going on from the world, because I felt like no one would understand and I was too scared and ashamed to talk about it. Since then I have learned that so many people experience mental health problems and they are nothing to be ashamed about!
Throughout my two years in therapy, I learned how to cope with the anxiety and why/what caused it. Without CAMHS, I wouldn't be where I am today. Recovery isn't easy, and the first step is the hardest but once you begin your journey, it will get better. You don't have to struggle alone! After a long time, I'm happy to tell my story and I hope that it helps you. Please don't hide everything away from the fear of what people will think! You are not alone and you can get through this!