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Identity and Disordered Eating

Identity and Disordered Eating

Service users share how they relate to their own personal experiences of disordered eating

EDAW 2023

For Eating Disorders Awareness Week, we are centring the voices of people in East London who have experienced disordered eating. Often, public awareness of eating disorders is mired in outdated stereotypes. To help challenge this, we asked service users about what they would most want people to know about who they are. A common theme that came up was the impact of different aspects of our identities. The quotes below illustrate how certain individuals relate to their own personal experiences of disordered eating and we are incredibly grateful to everyone who has shared. However, please note that they are not intended to provide a set ‘truth’ about what it is like to have an eating disorder. People who are struggling may relate to some, none, or all the below – all experiences are valid and should be taken seriously. If you are experiencing disordered eating, please be aware that the below content may be challenging for you and we encourage you to read (or not read) with care.

Cultural norms can impact on our experience of disordered eating 

“In treatment they worked with me to understand my cultural and traditional values especially as family meals, religious occasions and celebrations all hinged around traditional food. I suffered high levels of food fear and food anxiety. Away from concerns around my size and weight I actually struggled to eat as I had loads of food fears, especially traditional food.” 

“Being from a South Asian background where the stereotype is that, for example, Sikh Punjabi men ‘have to be’ quite well built and macho... I don’t fit into that stereotype because I’m only 5”6 and I’m very slim. It’s quite a difficult thing within the community because whenever I meet friends or family members, the first thing they say to me is are you ok and stuff like that.” 

This can make it difficult to understand what we are experiencing

“I’m not living up to the stereotypes [in my community] and I’m essentially just trying to come to terms with it myself as well.”  

“We kept silent about my issues; my family only spoke to me in private. It was embarrassing to think about eating disorder in my culture as it’s an unknown illness.” 

Collage by Katharine Lazenby, made whilst an inpatient receiving treatment for anorexia

Collage of Face Pieces

Experiences of marginalisation can also have an impact on disordered eating

“Due to my ethnicity/cultural background, I have suffered a lot of injustice throughout my life and so am constantly stressed. I eat rich food and sweet things to help me manage this stress. The culture that I come from lacks support, so I had no help around how to manage myself.” 

“Being mixed and an atheist has socially isolated me, so I comfort eat. Also acting affects my self-image and being a parent whose kids are not very kind sometimes makes me comfort eat.” 

Our individual backgrounds shape what we need from healthcare – it is not one size fits all

 “I now know that I am also allowed to struggle with spicy food irrelevant of my south Asian roots.” 

“For my relatives, as English is not their first language the health service staff didn’t fully understand their identity, because they are unable to express themselves and understand the system. It’s a very basic interaction without going into details or considering intersectionality aspects of their care.” 

“I do feel that my cultural [background] and ethnicity have affected my eating disorder… For example, I was told by elder members of my family that I can cook and eat any time of the night.” 

Parenthood can significantly impact experiences of disordered eating

 “The biggest part in my identity that’s interacted with my eating disorder has been age and having a child.” 

“Being a parent means I try to not express body issues so as not to influence my children” 

“My children are my biggest cheerleaders and I never even understood that they were living this with me.” 

“A significant part of my identity is as a mother. When I first became a mother, I thought that mothers have nice round bodies, I’ll try and be like that. But identity is not just one thing, so it kind of depends where I’m identifying myself."

But beyond any ‘labels’, we are all individuals with our own unique traits…

“[My identity] is not things like my nationality or religion – it’s about trying to have integrity with everything I do.” 

 “I feel like I'm quite an empathetic person, and that's quite important to my self-identity.” 

Photography by Katharine Lazenby, taken whilst an inpatient receiving treatment for anorexia 

Window Distortion

 “What makes me unique…my motivation is pretty strong. I tend not to give up and always learn from different aspect of life or people that I meet, and I aim to improve every day.”  

“I’m an artist. A significant part of my identity is as a mother.” 

“Perfectionism and also innovation are positive traits of my normal personality but have at times interacted with my eating disorder.”

… and keeping in touch with other parts of our identity outside of disordered eating can have a positive effect 

“When disordered eating started to impact how I was at work and worrying that people might discover my problems, that was one reason why I wanted to change.”

“Being involved in drama groups or indeed any other social activities helps me forget about food.”  

A note from ELFT

At East London Foundation Trust, we have been working with Experts by Experience to design a new Community Disordered Eating Service that meets all kinds of needs. We understand that eating disorders and disordered eating don’t have a ‘look’ and often do not fit traditional stereotypes - our aim is to connect everyone with the support they need. If you are struggling with disordered eating and live in the boroughs of Newham, Tower Hamlets, or City & Hackney, you can ask your GP to refer you to our service. You can also refer yourself via our website at the Community Disordered Eating Team.

Referral Form >>

Further information about eating disorder support can be found on the Beat website >>